When Psychotherapy Feels Stuck: Why Therapy Sometimes Doesn’t Help (At First)
- TTYL1
- Nov 24
- 4 min read
As a therapist, it's not uncommon to hear:
“I’m still anxious… does that mean therapy isn’t working?”, “Why do I feel like nothing is changing?”, or “I feel like i've been doing everything right, shouldn't I be further along by now?”
While therapy can be deeply transformative, the reality is that it is normal to hit phases where the work feels slow, stagnant, or even unhelpful. This doesn’t mean therapy has failed. But it does mean something needs attention.
In this post, we’ll explore:
Why therapy sometimes feels “stuck”
How to know whether it’s a normal plateau or something deeper
Why perinatal clients experience this more intensely
How life context affects therapeutic progress
What clients can do when they feel like therapy isn’t helping
How to talk to your therapist if you’re feeling stuck
What Makes Therapy Feel Stuck?
For many clients—especially mothers and parents—the sticking point is this:
Progress isn’t immediately visible.
For example:
You still feel anxious taking your baby out in public…yet you have been able to go for short walks on quieter streets with your baby.
You still feel overwhelmed…but you are setting firmer boundaries with family and scheduling time for yourself.
You still feel stressed…but you haven’t had the same panic symptoms in weeks.
It’s natural to measure progress by how we feel, yet healing often shows up as:
Increased coping
More insight
Better emotional regulation
What used to be impossible slowly becoming tolerable
Progress in therapy is often quiet and easily missed until we look back with perspective.
When Therapy Is Just Moving Slowly (and That’s Normal)
Not every week in therapy is a breakthrough.Some seasons are:
uncomfortable
boring
subtle
consolidating
foundational
This is developmentally appropriate. Small improvements stack over time, but they often only become obvious in hindsight.
As therapists, we look for signs the work is still moving even if progress is slow, such as:
The client continues engaging
Coping skills are being practiced
Small shifts in behaviour, thinking, or tolerance are happening
Remember, Slow ≠ unhelpful.
When Therapy Is Actually Stuck
However, sometimes therapy is plateauing or not helping. Signs of this might include:
Symptoms intensifying over time
Ongoing avoidance (in therapy or in life)
No desire or willingness to engage in the work
Not attending or participating in therapy meaningfully
The original goals have been reached and therapy has nowhere else to go
The client’s needs are outside the therapist’s scope of practice
These are moments when therapy needs to shift—not end necessarily—but be re-evaluated with honesty and intention.
It’s Not Always About the Modality
Outcomes in therapy are not just about the modality like CBT, DBT, EMDR, or any other approach.
Research consistently shows that therapy progress is influenced by:
the therapist–client relationship
readiness for change
external life stressors and supports
emotional and physical capacity at the time
safety and trust in the room
workload outside of therapy
systemic factors
If You Feel Like Therapy Isn’t Working—Here’s What You Can Do
Instead of silently wondering, bring it into the room.
Ask Yourself:
What was I hoping therapy would change?
Am I practicing skills between sessions?
What am I still avoiding?
Has life been so overwhelming that regulation must come first?
Do I have the support I need outside therapy to make change possible?
Do I feel emotionally safe with my therapist?
Do I feel judged or misunderstood?
Am I able to be honest?
Do I trust this process?
Ask Your Therapist:
Have I made progress, even subtle progress, since starting?
Are we working toward the same goals we agreed on?
I'm feeling stuck, is there something we can work on today that might provide relief for this feeling/concern....?
Are there any tools or skills i can practice outside of therapy?
Would a different style, frequency, or modality help?
Do we need to revisit or rewrite my goals?
Is it possible I would benefit from another therapist who is a better fit?
These conversations are not confrontational—they are a normal and healthy part of therapy. Insight here can help you and your therapist refine next steps.
If You’re Feeling Stuck in Therapy, Here’s Your Permission Slip
You are not doing therapy “wrong.” You are not failing. You are not broken. Feeling stalled is common—and workable. Naming it is often the first breakthrough.
Sometimes the work needs to:
slow down
change direction
deepen
step back and stabilize
or temporarily pause
Small changes—like getting out of the house with baby even though anxiety is still present—are movement. Over time, movement becomes momentum.
Ready for Support That Meets You Where You Are?
If you’re navigating pregnancy, postpartum, work transitions, identity changes, anxiety, or burnout—and want therapy that is:
individualized
evidence-based
trauma-informed
collaborative
paced with your nervous system
I’m a Registered Psychotherapist in Ontario specializing in supporting women through life transitions around work, perinatal mental health, parenthood, grief, and more.
I offer virtual therapy across Ontario and walk-and-talk therapy in Barrie and Simcoe County. If you’re ready to start—or restart—with intention, you can reach out anytime.
